Blizzard finally finishes World of Warcraft after six damn years

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some_textWÓRLDWIDE- So yes, it is finished now. The game I thought I had in the backseat of my car on release night is finally here, and all I had to do was pay THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS AND WAIT SIX DAMN YEARS. More

Magical broom has a lot of work ahead of it

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Valley of the Watchers, TANARIS – One broom, one desert, one mission.  More

Cataclysmic event somehow improves just about everything

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some_textOrgrimmar, KALIMDOR – For weeks we were warned that the elements would remake Azeroth. There were rumors that Deathwing would emerge and torch the world. Some even said that the seas themselves would open up and present new dangers to the Horde and Alliance. Well whatever the cause, thank you and more please!  More

Blizzard cuts costumer service staff from 25 to 10 ‘in the spirit of Cataclysm’

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some_textIrving, 16/F/CALI – Blizzard today announced their plans to immediately lay off 15 costumer service workers, severely dampening their ability to handle a swell of hacked accounts, but also mirroring their plans for their flagship World of Warcraft. “We’re always listening to our dev team, and their latest research seems to indicate a universe-wide mathematical anomaly, that 10 can equal 25, and so with Cataclysm and our costumer service staff it shall be,”  said CEO Mike Moreham.

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Light-brite may not be able to run Cataclysm on highest settings

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some_textIrving, Callifforrniaa – News today that may sadden a few long time players, who for years have been running World of Warcraft on their childhood Light-brite toys. Officials today announcing that due to significant graphical upgrades in the coming expansion, standard Light-brite users may be forced to run the game on normal graphics settings. Players using the newer Light-brite Pros should be able to  continue using the ultra settings. More

Thrall asks Garrosh to forward mail, to water houseplants, and to not completely overhaul Orgrimmar.

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some_textGrommash Hold, DUROTAR – Glorious and wise warcheif Thrall has made only a few requests for young Garrosh. Simple things like watering the hold plants, collecting the mail, turning lights on and off to make it look like someone is living there…. oh and not overhaul the entire city, which seemed to surprise Garrosh. More

Brand new Cataclysm zone revealed: Desolace.

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some_textDesolace will be a brand new zone launched presumably with the Cataclysm expansion. Among the many things you can do is participate in the skirmishes of two warring centaur factions… where YOU get to pick the side you are on! Blizzard is really stretching their creative muscles for this expansion!  More

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